Do it for the children

While I am in one of these moods, let me expand on a post I published back around September 11th. You can look it up, I don’t feel like it.

If you believe any of the following…

FDR knew about and allowed Pearl Harbor to happen
The CIA whacked JFK
9/11 was an inside job
That man-made <strike>global warming</strike> climate change exists

…you should immediately put a gun in your mouth and pull the trigger — preferably a large caliber weapon or a shotgun. Since most of the idiots that believe the above are leftist gun-fearing pussies, I suggest you just go to local market and buy some Drano and drink it down.

Hell, you liberal global climate change tree huggers are all about population control, put your money where your mouth is and just off yourself. Give Darwinism a chance. Abort yourself. Die for what you believe in. Your decaying body will be one giant carbon offset! Just think what your decomposing body will do for your compost pile.

Go all Monkey Wrench Gang on yourself. Consider this, with every ignorant mouth breathing exhale you are spewing evil CO2 into the atmosphere. You are killing Gaea for your grandkids. How can you live with that knowledge? Good God, it is a miracle Captain Planet hasn’t come by to kick your ass regularly.

Better yet, go kill yourself in the woods. After all, animals have rights, who are you to deny them the right to eat you? Have a right-thinking Conservative friend shoot you. That will be one less bullet for the war mongers to use. That is one less round available to kill an innocent grandma working at the 7-11. Do not forget to make your shooter promise to drive your Prius when he takes you for your last ride. We wouldn’t want to waste precious natural resources ridding the world of your ignorance. Maybe you should drive yourself off a tall cliff in an SUV. It will rid the world of a moron and a gas guzzler. I consider that a real two-fer-one Christmas gift. If you can’t do it for me, do it for the children.